US tour and Banff

Hi! I´m writing this blog from lovely Banff in Alberta, Canada. This is one of the most scenic spots in Canada and it´s quite a tourist attraction in the middle of the Rocky Mountains. I´m going to stay here for 2X3 months doing a long-term creative artist residency at the Banff Centre. I did a 4-week short term residency in February 2008, but this will be the real thing! Now I have a unique chance to update my technique, learn a lot of music and really do all the things that I´ve been thinking of doing but never got the chance to do. So there will be 5 months (2,5 + 2,5 actually) of intense and compressed work. But recreation is never a problem in these environments.. pool, jacuzzi, bar, panoramic restaurant, hotel room and of course wonderful scenery with plenty of hiking trails and skiing. So recovery and relaxation is also compressed here! 

I flew in from Seattle this morning after the Nordic Elegance tour part 2 to the north western USofA. I was on the road for 4 weeks doing 14 concerts. It was a lot of fun, great variety of audience (both in age and size), many different pianos to adapt to, quite a lot of driving and so forth. It´s a challenge to keep the energy and inspiration up when you do a concert program that many times. But it went well and it was a success everywhere. But my mind is very focused on Banff now and I really think this will be a wonderful period. I´ve done the Nordic Elegance program over 30 times this year and in between tours I finished my masters in Trondheim playing Scriabin + Grieg concerto in Moldova. I also "swallowed" a huge amount of music this summer accompanying singers. So now I feel very ready to start a new progressive circle of ideas, development and action. I´ll work on new pieces related to technical work now, early Beethoven, Scarlatti, Rachmaninov and some crazy difficult etudes. Then I´ll prepare new program(s) after Christmas! I think one of them will be called "From Grieg to Gershwin." I won´t go into details yet, but I think it has great potential. I´ll also pick up a whole lot of pieces I´ve played over the years and re-study them with updated technique and artistic insight. I´ll also do some physical and spiritual experiments concerning for instance yoga, meditation, exercise and diet. And this is a perfect place to do such things. Now I can have routines for the first time in a LONG time for instance. We also live in a "bubble" here where you don´t have to worry about anything from the so-called real world. So all these things are much easier to accomplish because you don´t have to adapt to anything at all. 

I´ll tell you more next Sunday! Because this blog will be updated every Sunday from now on. I have no idea what I´ll write, because I just start to write and I don´t know where I´ll end up... See ya!

USA tour

Hey!

How you doin´? I´m back in the USA now! The Nordic Elegance tour part2 is rockin´ and rollin´ again. I´ve done 2 concerts so far, one in Lynnwood and one in Bellingham, Washington. Right now I´m in Anacortes, a very charming little coastal town up in the north-western corner of the United States. I had the day off today, so I went for a 85 minutes ferry sight-seeing to Friday Harbor. That´s another charming little town located on the San Juan Island. It was sure nice to get some good breaths of fresh air, some sunshine and Norwegian summer temperatures. Very relaxing and nice day. 

Just to give you a brief summary of my travel so far... I came from Norway 10 days ago and landed in Phoenix, AZ where I visited my good friends from the Sons of Norway lodge in Scottsdale and had a meeting at the Steinway Store about a possible future performance. After that I went to Palm Springs (from hot to hot in other words...) and met with some other people that could be interested in a performance. But my main purpose for the trip to California was to visit professor Kevin Fitz-Gerald at the University of Southern California. I had 3 private lessons with him. It´s really nice to get some advise about how to work and develop. And as you might also know, I´ll be spending in total 6 months as a long term artist resident at the Banff Centre in Banff, AB, Canada. I´ll work hard there to try to really unleash my full potential as a human being and pianist. (First human, then musician. Quote: Edvard Grieg.) Then I´ll hopefully go to India for 3 months to get rid of any remaining ego and become God. Me? Ambitious? Hehe. 

Anyway, the tour has 12 remaining concerts, but I´ll have a 1 week break after tomorrows concert in Stanwood. The reason is Labor Day weekend. I´ll go to a retreat place at the Whidbey Island to have my vacation at the lovely Earth Sanctuary. I´ve been working pretty much constantly all year, so 7 days totally off will be just fine. I´m also realizing that my Nordic Elegance program is pretty hard. It takes a lot of physical and mental energy. That´s a challenge, but a very healthy challenge. What concerns me a bit is that the attendance is generally lower than it was in 2007. This is not because of bad advertisement. I think it´s because of the economy and the financial crisis. It´s not that people can´t afford to go to a concert, it´s just that they THINK they can´t afford to go to a concert. I think that people are reluctant to go out and do things. It´s the same story all over the place according to the people I talk to. It´s a real pity, and a bit disturbing for a freelance musician. Right now I rely on attendance to get my income. If this goes on I would have to do things differently... So I suggest you get your butt out of that chair and come to the concert. I´ll give you a good experience and interesting information about Norwegian music, and you´ll give me money so I can go to India. Sounds like a deal to me. Ok? Ok. 

Money is a real pain by the way. But I want it and I have to admit that. And the only reason why I want it is because I want to spend it. There´s so many things I want to do in life. That´s all! You can´t put a price tag on music, on experience.. but we´re left with no choice. Isn´t it funny? Most people agree that you can´t put a dollar mark on an experience, it could be music, arts, nature or anything else that has to do with love... life... meaning... sincerity... spirituality and so forth. But if there´s just a little disturbance in the stock market, this is the first thing we let go of. Isn´t it wierd? Do you see how f***** up it really is? Oohh, it feels good to be straight and potentially provocative :-) By the way, there´s a big difference between spirituality and organized religion. Organized religion is dogmatized, externalized spirituality based on fear and greed and it´s pretty dangerous. I see organized religion as a misunderstanding of spiritual ideas. Combine it with organized politics and you´re really screwing up Nature´s plan. I watched a stand up show by the late Bill Hicks the other day. He was a very straight, angry and obnoxious guy with the most noble and subtle ideas and intentions you can imagine. He said something about his political point of view (this was in the early 90s): ".. it´s not that I disagree with Bush´s economic policy or foreign policy. It´s just that I believe he´s the child of Satan here to destroy the planet Earth." Humand mind/Ego=fear and greed. Society=manifestation of the collective Mind/Ego=fear and greed. 

I think I´ll end this blog with another quote from Bill Hicks. A rather brilliant one. 

"Life is like a ride in an amusement park. And when you choose to go it you think it´s real because that´s how powerful our minds are. And the ride goes up and down and round and round, it has thrills and chills and it´s very brightly colored and it´s loud. And it´s fun... for a while. Some people has been on this ride for a long time, and they begin to question: is this real? Or is it just a ride? And other people have remembered and they come back to us and say: hey, don´t worry, don´t be afraid, ever, because... it´s just a ride. And we......... kill those people...."shut him up.. we have a lot invested in this ride.. SHUT HIM UP. Look at my furrows of worry, look at my big bank account. And my family. This just HAS to be real." It´s just a ride.. But we always kill those people who try to tell us that. Do you ever notice that?.. And let the demons run amok. But it doesn´t matter because... it´s just a ride. And we can change it anytime we want. It´s only a choice, no effort, no worry, no work, no savings of money, just a choice right now between fear and love. The eyes of fear wants you to put bigger locks on your doors, buy guns and close yourself off. The eyes of love instead see all of us as One. Here´s what we can do to change the world right now, to a better ride. Take all that money we spend on weapons and defense each year, and instead spend it feeding, clothing and educating the poor of the world, which it would many times over - not one single being excluded. And we can explore space together, both inner and outer. Forever. In peace."

Working working

Hi again. I hope you´re not too disappointed that I´m not updating the blog every Sunday. I intend to do so when the summer is over and I move to Banff. Because I got the confirmation now. I WILL go to Banff in Canada for 6 months and surround it with tours in the US. It´s certainly nice to know that for a fact now. In the meantime I´m working like crazy to earn some money. I´ve spend July playing a couple of gigs with the gypsy music orchestra Trio Troika. I also did a spanish concert with two sopranos at the Norwegian Opera (the new magnificent building you know..) and for the past days I´ve been working with the opera the Magic Flute in Stjørdal. I´m in the busiest period now with the singing master class right around the corner. There are 16 singers, and I have to be prepared to play with all of them. What a pile of music... And I´m going to play 10am-0615pm every day. But I kinda look forward to it. I think it will be nice. 

The good thing about doing so many things during a summer is that you are forced not to worry. What I mean is that the only thing you can do is let go when the project is finished and proceed to the next one. And then you have a pile of music in front of you. And you know that you HAVE to know this by a certain time (just a few days ahead maybe). The quickest and best way of doing that is just doing it without worrying about it. If you only have 1 big concert for a period of time, you start building up expectations, nerves, and potential problems for yourself. Trying too hard is actually a hindrance! And the concept of trying is an action of the mind/ego in itself. But if you´re in the Zone, meaning being in tune with your true Self (meditative state) the effort will be less, the comfort will be higher and the result will be better. You just trust, do it and let go afterwards. I keep saying that performing music is compressed spirituality. And I think that´s a truth in many levels. Because the same thing can be said about performing a piece. If you start thinking and judging during the performance, you´re doomed! Trusting, accepting and letting go is the way. If you think, you can´t be centered on your heart. And if you don´t play from your heart, there won´t be any art coming out of it. 

Another interesting thing about performers and the audience: you will attract what you project. Again, this is a universal truth applied to arts. For example, if you are a very intellectual musician playing with your head, you will attract people who are head-based intellectuals. If you play from your heart (by heart I mean Self/Soul/Zone...), you will touch something else in people. They will be attracted to the performance without knowing exactly why. Die-hard intellectuals will probably not understand what all the fuss is about and find things that should be different or bettered according to the score or tradition or something. I read a review from a concert the other day. It was a performance from a highly respected Norwegian pianist. It was a great great review. I´ve never been crazy about this artist to be honest because I think he´s too intellectual in his approach. But the guy who wrote the review was amazed by the performance. When I read it I noticed that one of the best compliments he gave was "amazing sound production in the middle register of the piano..." I expected something like "touched the souls and hearts etc etc." But no. Then it struck me: the guy who wrote the review must have been highly intellectual in his approach. So he was of course amazed about all the intellectual things the artist did with the instrument and music. 

Anyway.. Paramahamsa Nithyananda says that music will bring the listener to where it comes from. Which is the same thing as I tried to explain. So if the performer is deeply rooted in his Self, maybe even a spiritually enlightened being, the performances will rise people´s consciousness. This is why true art is much more important than people can imagine. Scriabin stated all his life that music (his music) could transform people and rise the consciousness towards Unity. In that case, music is directly related to spirituality and the essence of life on earth. By the way, the word Yoga means Unity. So I guess my quest then is to become enlightened myself. It would be the most important thing I would ever do for myself. And music would be my tool to channel it to whoever is listening. I think this is the true nature and purpose of music. The classical music from India is made on these premises. The old eastern philosophies are build around Enlightenment. To them, the only true meaning of life is to reach the ultimate state of consciousness, Enlightenment. And music is of course connected to this. 

Alright.. it´s time for me to sleep now! Enjoy the rest of your summer!

Concerts and vacation

Hi there! It seems like every other week is a good time for a new blog! I haven´t decided it or anything, it just happens. :)

Since last time you heard from me, I´ve done 2 major things. The first one was a great outdoor opera concert. I guess you know that Norway has a new opera house in a place called Bjørvika in Oslo. There is another place in Norway called Bjørvika. That´s a small place on the small island Ytterøy outside Levanger. 10 years ago when the Norwegian government decided to build the new opera house in Bjørvika, a couple of farmers on this island though: hmm, ok! This is the place: http://www.ytteroy.no/pages/bygdetun/program.html. It´s in Norwegian only... So for the past 10 years they´ve had an opera show on this lawn between the buildings. This year we had 600 in the audience! That´s about 100 above sell-out! But everyone is welcome if they bring their own chair. It´s really a special thing. Since I joined as a pianist 4 years ago, the weather has been great every time. That´s close to a miracle in this part of the world. 

Usually we´re 2 pianist for this event, but I was on my own this year. So I had my plate full. But it was a lot of fun. Immediately after my return from this island, I had to start preparing for the non-piano activities this summer. Because I´ll do 4 performances with Trio Troika. You can visit their website for more information. But it is a gypsy trio consisting of violin, double bass and accordion. Soo... I´m digging out my accordion to perform with them this summer. I almost never play the accordion any more. But this is a really fun thing to do! A lot of energy and passion in the gypsy music. There will be 3 festivals this summer, Frosta, Frøya and Vanylven + a gig here in Trondheim. The first one, Frosta, is coming up this Saturday. 

As you understand, this summer is pretty much packed. And that´s really my own choice. I wanted to work like crazy this summer to earn some money. My trip to Banff, which still isn´t 100% confirmed, will stop income for 6 months. And I also have a dream of going to India for 3 months next summer. But I did have 3-4 days off at the end of last week. The weather has been exceptionally good for a period now. So I decided to take some time off and relax. I´ve done some sunbathing, had a massage and some other spa-like treatment, listened to music, watching several episodes of the old comedy classic Cheers etc. But now I´m back in business and have plenty of things to learn within this week. Next week I´ll actually perform in the lobby in the new opera house in Oslo! They have a summer daytime concert series there. I will do an all Spanish program with to great sopranos from the national opera school located in Oslo. That will be a blast! More on that next time!

Summer!

Hi everybody! I´m writing this from Oslo, but I will go back to Trondheim again today. I´ve been her for over a week now to do various things. Last weekend I went to yet another meditation workshop. So I´ve had enough input for a while. I´ve also been practicing with some opera singers for some concerts in August. Singers and opera is really the key words for this summer. I have plenty of things to do now, and most of it is accompanying singers. I don´t think there will be a single moment of boredom this summer. There´s a big one coming up this Saturday on the island Ytterøya. This is an annual event with several great singers, mostly professional and good students. The location is very special because it´s outdoors on an old farm property. You have to take a ferry to get to the island, but the last years we´ve had 5-600 in the audience. Normally we have 2 pianists to cope with this, but I´m alone this year so my plate is full. 

I´ve done a couple of interesting things this weekend. First of all I did a solo recital in a private home here in Oslo on Friday. This guy has a nice Fazioli grand piano in his living room and invites his friends over 1-2 times a year for a concert and party. I was lucky enough to be the pianist this year, and I did a 45 minutes concert with Russian and Norwegian music. The surprising thing was that the Opera Director in Oslo, Paul Curran, attended the event. He´s known for his straghtforwardness and brutal honesty. So it was very nice to hear that he truly enjoyed the concert and the following party. He was a really cool guy to talk to. His main passion besides opera is piano music, and especially Scriabin! So we had some things to talk about. 

The other interesting thing I did this weekend is something TOTALLY different. You see, I´ve been very interested in health and diet in the past. It all goes along with my spiritual interest. And for the past years I´ve been following, more or less, a high-fat low-carb diet. I´ve been enjoying this even though it has been kinda hard to maintain. But since my spiritual interest and insight is developing, I wanted to look into what the spirituality says about food and dieting. I did have an idea of course and I knew that it was a vegetarian diet. But I wanted to really look into it and dig a little bit. And I found exactly what I was looking for. http://www.timelesshealth.net/ 

I was so relieved because here we have this health-geek that has done all the research for me. He has tried all the diets on the market, including the paleo-diet I´ve been into +++. He also have a high spiritual interest and has done spiritual research and backed it up with scientific facts. He made a diet program called diet of the masters. The word masters here refer to the spiritual masters like Buddah, Krishna, Jesus and also the Greek masters, athletes and the healthiest cultures of the world. These people didn´t care if the food they ate was called carbs, proteins or fat. But they sought the food with the most nutrition. Because even if you eat plenty of calories, the body will tell you to eat more if it lacks all the nutrition it needs (vitamins, minerals etc etc). It seems like the old masters ate 1-2 times a day, vegetarian and exactly the right products. You can check out the details yourself if you´re interested. But I´m going to start testing this now. So I prepared my body this weekend by fasting for 24 hours and doing a C24 body cleanse. Quite an experience... 

Ascension

Hello everybody! I would like to write something about ascension today. This weekend I went to Oslo to learn ascension. But what is it? It is a form of meditation. Ascension means to rise up or transcend. And what you´re actually doing is rising above your mind and entering the sphere of the infinite. I´ve been in touch with a variety of self development programs and spiritual systems. Some of them focuses on positive thinking, how to organize the thoughts and use them to your advantage, how do control the thoughts and so forth. Ascension goes straight to the point and learns us how to go beyond thoughts (and feelings and everything else related to the term "mind.") So instead of solving our mental problems and dissolving our bad mental patterns from the outside, ascension takes us straight to the core and dissolves the thought-patterns from the inside. 

I know this is weird stuff if you´re not familiar with spirituality. But all of spirituality (real spirituality) is about finding the Self which is beyond the mind (thoughts/feelings). Or to put it this way: it´s about keeping the focus and attention on the gap between the thoughts instead of the thoughts. And what do we find there? Silence. Is that silence nothingness? According to all spirituality it´s actually everything. If there wasn´t darkness, we wouldn´t have light. If there wasn´t silence, there wouldn´t be sound. Anyway, this is the ultimate meditative state - the goal of all meditation. This is the source of ultimate solutions, unconditional love, infinite energy, peace, total freedom, joy and bliss. Our natural state. This is a state without societal conditionings, limitations and ego. It´s the God within! Our wise inner master. 

Hmm.. I kinda feel sorry for you that you have to read all this, especially if you aren´t interested in spirituality. hehe. But I´m telling you: If you have any problems in your life, this will solve it. All the solutions, energy and love that we need and want in our life and society is exactly there - in the gap between your thoughts. NOT thinking sounds like an impossible task. And it is. But we can all learn how to stop identifying with thoughts. Because thoughts are mostly just bothering us - blaming us for things from the past, worrying about all kinds of hypothetical things in the future and so forth. Thoughts are for the most part just irrelevant associations. If you start observing your mind for a while, you will notice that. We think that we create a nice, streamlined, logical line of thoughts. But they really don´t have any connection. It´s just one thought associating with the previous one. It´s a machine that just runs on its own. It never stops - not even when we sleep! And the problem is that we think we are the thoughts!! We are controlled by our mind, we are addicted to it. It runs our lives, but it´s not really us! You can observe your thoughts, can´t you? If you try right now? Just watch the thoughts for a minute, count them, observe how they are connected. Now.. if you can observe your thoughts, how can they be you? If you are your thoughts, who is observing them? By being inside your thoughts at any time, you can never be in the present moment. You can never really live and express your full potential. Again observe it... a thought is either from the past or the future. 

If you´re still reading this blog at this stage, you probably realize that I´m quite inspired from this weekend of ascension. :-) I´ve been familiar with all these principals for a long time. But as I said, it´s close to impossible to force your mind not to think. Ascension, as far as I can tell after 1 day, is a remarkably simple way to go straight to the core and dissolve the surrounding thoughts. But the point is to stay in the core, not to remove the thoughts. And the thing is that everybody on planet earth have experienced this already. Because small babies are there all the time!! Just watch them. They are totally in the moment, living naturally, without worry, with total love and no limits. You´ve probably also lost yourself to a nice piece of music, having a moment of total silence in the beautiful nature or something like that. You´re also experiencing it all the time, every day. Because there will be a small gap between each thought. We just have to keep the focus on the gap, make the gap longer and longer and expanding from there. This is our natural state. So spirituality and the whole idea of mediation, no-mind etc, is nothing special, intellectual or anything like that. It´s simply about discovering who you really are - to regain your true state. 

Exam Concert

Alright, it´s about time to tell you about my exam concert. Last week was the big week! And what can I say? My head feels kinda empty now after having actually done it. Monday - Wednesday was really intense in one way, and quite relaxing in another way. It was a WONDERFUL experience to work with the conductor and orchestra for 3 days. I learned a lot from it and the result was quite good in the end I think. Being a soloist with an orchestra is a situation that is stressful in a way, but very nice too. I like it a lot. And when I get more experience of the situation I think I will really love it. The relaxing part was that I was actually able to NOT get stressed out in between. I didn´t practice too much or think too much about the performance between the rehersals. 

I was surprised to see quite a number of people attending the concert at 1pm on a Wednesday. There must have been 150-200 people there. The feeling I had afterwards was: "it was ok.. could have been worse, could have been better." So I guess I did the best I could then! The comments from my friends in the audience were very positive indeed. And the critic from "Adresseavisen," the biggest newspaper in Trondheim, was very very positive and gave a great review. I shared the concert with a flute player, and she got wonderful reviews as well. So it was a very special day for us. He used us as examples of the young and upcoming generation of musicians; well reflected about what we´re doing without being bound by tradition. He said that our performances could have been made on any stage and still be great. 

I must say I haven´t really had time to sit down and feel how it is like to be done with all the studies. I´ve been in Trondheim and somehow attached to the Music Conservatory since the autumn of 2000. So this is the end of an era for me. It is definitely time for me to look outside Trondheim. And it´s not that I haven´t started doing it with all my touring and everything! But I think I should break loose from the town for a period of time now. I can always return later. But for my own musical and personal growth, I think it´s important that I leave this area. I really feel like being based outside Norway for a few years. The US is of course a natural choice for me since I´ve done so many concerts there and started to get good contacts. So I will go for a 3-years O-visa from 2010 and see what happens. But the best thing would probably be to roam  around a little bit. But establishing a kind of base in the US for a period could be cool. 

Being a freelance performer is extremely interesting. The thing I´m thinking about now is "how much to control it and how much to just go with the flow?" In the bigger picture the answer is indeed "go with the flow." But for instance now, I´ve booked a 4 week tour in September, applied for a 6 months residency in Banff, Alberta and started booking another tour in April-May 2010. It is sort of a way of controlling things since I´ve "locked myself up" for a year! But then again, tours should be planned a year in advance and if I didn´t do it myself it wouldn´t be any tour at all. Anyway.. I´m sure it´s just a matter of getting used to it and getting tuned in. After all, the really good gigs are booked at least a year in advance. The big experienced concert musicians are fully booked 3-4 years ahead probably... I guess the only thing I should control is saying "yes" to gigs that I actually want and "no" to the ones that I don´t want. So it all comes down to doing what you enjoy doing the most. It also comes down to trust. I have to trust that things will work out, that I will get enough money, that I will have new ideas, that something will come to me from outside etc. I guess trust is the opposite of fear? The ultimate trust is probably that everything that happens is auspicious. No matter what will happen, it will be a great experience and a source of growth. Good and bad are just labels for our mind and society. It is what it is and it is auspicious. 

So to sum it up: it will be a very interesting period in my life! Ok, now my mind IS empty from all the candy, unhealthy food, beer and lack of meditation and physical exercise following the exam. :-) But I´ve already started to look forward and tomorrow I will be fully operational again.